Demi Sexuality Displayed Amongst Aggies

By Dante Miller, Yard Editor

Demi Sexuality is a term used to identify individuals who have a lack of sexual attraction toward any person unless they become deeply emotionally or romantically connected with a specific partner.

Students have often questioned the statistical depths behind Demi sexuality people, but here is a further look into their wonders.

NC A&T Student, Dante Miller had the pleasure of interviewing employee of Pier1 and Aggie Demi sexual student, Charlisa Goodridge, on her intake and experience.

Dante: Can you explain what demi sexuality is?

Charlisa: When a person feels no sexual attraction to another sex unless they are deeply intimate on a friendship level before anything else

Dante: When did you discover you were demi sexual?

Charlisa: I think I always knew I was something but I did not really figure it out until after I ended my first relationship.

Dante: When you were in your first relationship, did you have any sexual attraction or sexual actions encounter whatsoever?

Charlisa: We did but it took a while. It took a total of 3 years before I could actually do anything with my significant other.

Dante: A lot of people are confused on how you can have no sexual feeling whatsoever, so do you feel absolutely nothing at all? Also, could this be towards a woman as well? Please explain.

Charlisa: It can be towards a woman. Demi sexuality does not just stop with a straight person, it can go towards gay people as well. It is like a secondary sexuality but the feeling of sex all together is not really coherent in the everyday life. Also, I can look at someone with having no sexual attraction to them but I can acknowledge that they are attractive.

Dante: Starting off, how has this affected you?

Charlisa: It has affected me throughout my life. I always knew there was something a little off with me in a more negative way.

Dante: Can you explain how you were “off”?

Charlisa: I never really had any desire to be in a relationship or perform any sexual acts with anyone.

Dante: Is it like a sub branch of asexuality?

Charlisa: It is connected like a sub branch. Where asexual people can live their whole life and never think of sex and can be in a relationship and just don’t care too, whereas demi sexuality can feel those feelings but have to be deeply connected with the person they are with.

Dante: How has your experience been with demi sexuality been? When you enter into sexual relations, how has that physically affected you?

Charlisa: It has not affected me as much, because the person I was with, it was a more of an important thing for them and it could be a minor setback for the relationship, especially when I did not know how to really get deeply into it, when my partner wanted to.

Dante: What is something people do not understand about demi sexuality?

Charlisa: the biggest misconception is that it is normal for anybody to feel these feelings to just not want to be with a person and engage in any sexual acts. It may just be they are afraid to move on but it is normal to feel like this.

Dante: What attracts you in terms of a partner without thinking sexually?

Charlisa: A partner can be someone like my best friend. I can feel attraction intimately. I prefer to look for intimacy and love attraction in a person before sexual attraction, but I get comfort just getting that intimacy and love from my friends without being in a relationship.

Dante: What do you hope to get from your discovery of demi sexuality?

Charlisa: That this is not a black or white thing or a weird thing and it is okay to feel these feelings and identify yourself as a demi-sexual.

Dante: Have you ever met another demi sexual and what advice would you give them?

Charlisa: Yes, a friend reached out to me explaining that they have these same feelings while they are in a relationship currently, and I told her that it is absolutely normal to feel like that. I also told her that does not make her any less of a person or anything.

Dante: Could this be just having a low sex drive?

Charlisa: No, I do not consider this just a low self-drive. It is just not having the desire to be with someone for the sex unless we have a deep connection.

Demi sexuality is by far a normal experience for anyone to go through and it is considered to be a branch of asexuality. In this generation, today it is absolutely important to be physically attracted to a significant other prior to becoming sexually involved. Demi sexuality can be a term many people can practice to have a more positive outlook with your significant other, from the beginning.

Anyone with further questions, comments, or questions about demi sexuality can contact the A&T Register office via atregister@ncat.edu.